To be perfectly honest, I was slightly like you before I became pregnant.
I’ve always been relatively tough, wilful and independent. A ‘free spirit’ and a ‘rebel’, who didn’t quite believe the sort of traditional roles the society assigned to women.
Before pregnancy, I hadn’t been very interested in kids and was ‘selfish’ enough into thinking that I couldn’t face ending my ‘youth’ and liberty just for another human being. As a result, me and my partner didn’t even try for a baby until last summer, after years together.
I decided to try for a baby last summer partly because it seemed to be the ‘right thing to do’. But most importantly, I decided because I thought people I love deserved the joy. My partner absolutely adores children - each time when he saw a cute baby in the street, the look in his eyes could just break my heart. I felt that I simply couldn’t deny him of his own baby anymore even though he’s never pushed me.
But my feelings have been changing day by day since I became pregnant. Now just a few weeks from the 3rd trimester they’ve moved a mile.
It is truly as they say, ‘magical’. And trust me, you are going to feel love just in those little kicks. The thought that you’re carrying a little human inside of you, the warmth you feel when you know the baby is part of you and that you are one… Nothing compares to these. I’ve never felt anything so sweet yet unsettling, and I’ve never been more thankful in my life.
I’m sure you’re going to be a great Mum and you’ll know how it feels when your little one gets onboard. Chances are, you’re going to lose your ‘cool’ just like me:)
Great idea about hiring nanny but I think as lots of Mums suggested previously, it’s also important to let the baby feel your presence and love.
I grew up being looked after by two nannies, but my family made me felt that they loved me and were always there for me. And I think that made a whole lot of difference.
It’s a bit far stretched though since you haven’t conceived yet.
Hope you could see this and hopefully have more faith. Good luck with the baby.